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I Am…Woman? May 23, 2011

Posted by sarahsfate in My Own Personal Trials, PostADay2011.
Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

Being a man is hard enough, I suppose, for the ones who are born as such. You are expected to provide for your family, have a great career, provide offspring, and take out the garbage. Oh wait-

So…being a man is hard enough but if you are a woman who has to fulfill both gender-specific tasks, things get…a little tricky. So, sure, I’m single. I haven’t always been that way. I wonder if it is more difficult to have been married for a decade (with a man around to be the man) and then transform into a woman-man morphed existence…as opposed to having done it all yourself all along — or if it is basically the same either way.

For instance. Yes, I can take out the garbage…no mean feat that — although, according to every man I’ve come in to contact with, it is the most onerous task alive. I can hang paintings on the wall — although, for some reason the damn things lean to the same side all the time. I need to buy one of those gadgets. You know what I’m talking about…with the yellow jelly thing that moves back and forth inside a little bubble attached to a large flat object. What is that? Anyway, I’d know it in Home Depot if I saw it.

I bought chemical sprays for things like cleaning, door hinges, and spiders. I take my car to the auto shop for oil changes instead of having my husband do it. And…what else? Hmmm. I unclog drains, change air filters, and fix things that break. And I know I didn’t mention mowing but that’s because someone else mows my lawn for free, not because I wouldn’t do it. I actually like mowing — very therapeutic.

But tonight, I’m having an issue with my Wo/He-Man status. Why? I’ll tell you. Because my washing machine is trying to electrocute me. I know it has something to do with wiring and electricity and water. That’s about all I know. So…I unplugged the death trap and stood back to survey the machine from a safe distance (unplugged or not). I know diddly squat about wiring. Zilch. Nada. Zero. And then I thought that thought I swore I would never think.

I need a man. 

Yes, it is true. It might happen that I had a man and even he would not know what to do. But a man won’t tell you he doesn’t know how to deal with it because even if he doesn’t, he will call someone who does. (which is the obvious solution for me — just call someone who does know). But part of the greatness in having a man around to fix things I’m ignorant about is being able to pass the task off to someone, smack my hands together lightly, and move on to the next more-womanly task.

But this is my life. And this is me. Trying my best to be a man. Sort of.



1. R.H. - May 23, 2011

I dig. For the record, I DO have a man, but I still end up doing most of the manly jobs. Perhaps I should write the inverse to this… 😉

sarahsfate - May 23, 2011

You SHOULD! How great would that be 🙂

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